The "C" word

Just a small part of our Army Family

I remember when John and I were first married - we moved to Augusta, Georgia and I began my journey as an Army Wife. Yes...two capital letters because "army wife"is not just an adjective and a noun....it is a new job title.

It's weird. I REALLY had no idea what I was getting myself into. I figured I would just live my life as usual and then, on the side....like cole slaw....be an army wife. Sister, I was a poorly informed young girl who had no idea how deep and wide this new life was. ARMY WIFE...I had just joined a very complicated, elite, secret society of woman who can't even explain the joy, pain, responsibiities, expectations and sacrifice that would be gently expected of each of us. It's almost beyond words. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of Army Wives who turn up their noses at the status quo....but there are plenty that take a deep breath and dive right right in.



I love definitions....and I have another one for you...

COMPLACENCY: a feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often while
unaware of some potential danger, defect, or the like; self-satisfaction or smug
satisfaction with an existing situation, condition, etc.

You know what's special about complancency?...it doesn't exist in the army OR the Army Wife world. It just doesn't dwell here ....like the fear that an elephant will trample me when I walk outside to water my flowers. I NEVER think..."OH MY GOSH...if I don't run out there and water fast....Nettie may get me today!! Yesterday....well....it was close!" No fear of elephants.....no expectation of complacency.

In the army, just when you get comfortable....something happens. Deployment, job change, move, friends change duty stations, new neighbor moves in next door, your house turns out to be 1000 square feet....versus the 3000 square feet you had just 2 months prior, your dog suddenly hates your new house, your kid's friends move away, you find out you are moving sooner than expected, you find out you aen't moving when you expected, your soldier loves his job, your soldier tolerates his job, the new house has trees, your yard is rocks instead of grass because you moves from New York to Arizona, you fit in too well and clutter your calendar with volnteer work, you don't fit in and are lonely, finances are tight because of local foreign currency.....the list goes on and on and on. You NEVER rest.

I'm not complaining. Today I am sad. I'm also suffering from full blown PMS....oh, womanhood how I love you and all of your delicate details. My two closest friends are moving this week and darn-it-all if I wasn't just gettin' used to these gals. Sometimes I long for a "feeling of quiet pleasure or security"....especially with girlfriends. I love HAVING girlfriends and one would think I would be better at MAKING friends...but the sad truth is that I really have a hard time letting go and trusting people with "me". I'm not sure why that is...I'll get therapy...I promise...but for now "it is what it is".....the truth.

Michele and Geoff....sniff sniff....good-bye friends!

..Today I am making myself NOT cry. I'll cry tomorrow when Michele flies away....and as for Cackie...I'll see her on July 4th....I'll cry about her then. Oh, gosh...I forgot...Jodi across the street is "packing out" today and she flies on Friday. There may not be enough tears to go around...

Cackie, Rob and crew.....see ya later alligators...I'm gonna miss you!

And so...I tell you....Complancency is NOT an issue with Army Wives. And, even though we learn to adjust - there is always a secret place in our hearts that long to be "unaware of some potential danger...or the like" and bask in the glow of friendship for YEARS...not months. We are keenly aware of the potential pain and emptiness that comes with each move....and we are keenly aware that even when the black clouds look like the storm of the century - there is always a day that's 75 degrees and sunny near by....and you always know that the clouds only make those good days seem that much sweeter.



Sunny day....just come as soon as you can....okay?